Struggling to deal with a Powerful and Direct Communicator?
by Kylie Warry | 27th June, 2016 | 5 Comments

Direct styles of communication…

My passion is teaching people how to communicate authentically and effectively in any situation.

Did you know that there are different communication styles? Such differences can wreak havoc in our relationships, sometimes we just don’t get each other!

We all have our own communication style. Some people are task focused while others are people focused. Some are outgoing while others are reserved.

One of the four main styles is the Direct and Powerful communicator. They are action based, outgoing, task focused, results oriented and for the rest of the population they can be quite challenging. If this is your style, however, chances are you are not even aware of the impact you can have on others.

Direct and Powerful Communicators are motivated by challenges, they love problems can be highly competitive and extremely strong willed. If you want something done, give to this person. However, be aware they may leave bruises.

These guys really have no idea how straight down the line, no fuss, in your face they can be. To the average person they can seem aggressive, even like a bully. Sadly, this is not their intent at all. They are just after the result and if people get in the way, then that’s where the damage can occur.

This is my strongest style and I have been known to mow people down in the supermarket, I literally don’t see them. I am focused on the task and the task is to complete the shopping. It’s not to say “Hi”. To see who I know, to window shop. No, its get the items bag them and get out of there! I have had friends come up to me days later and say they felt really upset when I ignored them, I honestly did not even see them.

This powerful style gravitates to leadership and management roles where they can make decisions and have control. Unfortunately unless enlightened they can cause trouble for others. Problems arise because they are so fast paced, quick thinking, decisive and you got it – direct.

Don’t be too hard on the direct communicators in your world. They really have a good heart and don’t realise how pushy and direct they can be at times. Why? Because I don’t think anyone has been brave enough to tell them!

Next time we will look at the Playful Influencing communicator.

If you are a powerful communicator and are struggling checkout our resources page or contact us with your specific questions. For training to learn more about your style and how to get the most out of your relationships get in touch.

If you would love to understand yourself or others then check out your Communication DNA

Until next time, Care, Connect and be a Courageous Communicator. Let’s change the world we live in one conversation at a time.

5 Comments

ArtMoney on 11/07/2016 at 06:07pm
As a leader, the words you use and how you use them are just as powerful as the actions you take. Why? Because everything you say and do is being watched, dissected, and emulated by others. "How you communicate represents who you are to others and informs what you think about yourself," says Cynthia Kane, author of

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Bandicam on 16/07/2016 at 05:08am
Dear Karen, I found your article on dealing with power struggles very helpful, I have a ten year old son who every other morning makes a fuss to go to school. henormally leaves for school in a bad mood and I often feel like a real loser as we have heated arguments before he leaves. I wonder if giving him a choice that will turn the focus of his attention to a more positive aspect of school will help matters. It will be wonderful to hear from you.

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Kylie Warry on 18/07/2016 at 05:32pm
Hi :) thanks so much for reaching out. Power struggles with anyone can be hard and heart breaking, especially as a parent. If your son is a Powerful Communicator, they need their independence so allow them to make little appropriate choices. Look out for yourself too, it is stressful. You need to consciously end the battle for power and look at it more as a job of facilitating his growth. Be open and discuss what you expect from him and what the consequences will be for both good and bad choices on his behalf. One of the things I did as a parent would be when my son would scream for independence, would be to set up an agreement, discuss it and end up with something we were both happy with. For example, he gets an hour of x box if he cleans his room to the required standard by 5pm today. If he doesn't do it he does not get x box and he will also miss out tomorrow. I hope this helps :) I am very happy to help, there are heaps of great parenting blogs out there too, I look for ones that teach you how to be an authoritative parent. This is a skill that facilitates growth in our kids, teaching them how to make great decisions. All the best! Keep on caring, connecting and being a conscious communicator. Let's change the world we live in one conversation at a time. :)

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VideoMaster on 18/07/2016 at 04:34pm
My little girl is only 8 months and it seems like a constant power struggle. I m going to sign up to your course it looks amazing and just from reading a few of your articles I can tell you re a real expert in the field, I ve learned a lot so far.

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Kylie Warry on 18/07/2016 at 05:27pm
Hi, thanks so much for your kind feedback. Power struggles with anyone can be hard and heart breaking, especially as a parent. If they are Powerful, they need their independence so allow them to make little age appropriate choices. Look out for yourself too, it is stressful. One of the things I did as a parent would be when my toddler would scream about getting dressed, she had a few options to choose from, and we made a big celebration of her choice when she made it. Happy to help, keep on learning and trying out more skills to improve communication as it affects all of your relationships. All the best! Keep on caring, connecting and being a conscious communicator. Let's change the world we live in one conversation at a time. :)

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