What is trust Pt 2

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So in the previous blog we talked about how important trust is and how to build trust. If you missed it check it out here.

All right, that’s the ways we can build trust. But what about how we destroy trust – the five fastest ways to lose trust from our co-workers and in our personal relationships.

Act and speak inconsistently.

Nothing confuses people faster than inconsistency. And if confusion due to contradiction is the only constant, trust is sure to fall victim. Ensure that you are doing what you day and that you are behaving consistently with your message. If you are being honest, it is a no brainer. It is only when we are hiding something or thinking one thing and doing another that inconsistency is apparent.

Seek personal rather than shared gain.

One who is out only for him or her self, especially in a team environment, quickly loses the respect and trust of others. If you have ever experienced this you will understand this for sure.   Whenever we feel over looked or used it leaves and awful taste in our mouth. Seek shared gain and trust will grow

 Withhold information.

When the communication channels shut down – both top-down and bottom-up – rumors start and misinformation is believed to be real. Then come denials. True information is often too late, or is never offered. Then trust falls apart.

The moment you fill gaps with your own assumptions you are on shaky ground. When you notice gaps, ask questions, seek information that is accurate and then there will be less confusion. When you do this you will soon realise if information is being actively withheld or if there was a miscommunication.

Lie or tell half-truths

Untruthfulness is a quick way to break a bond of trust. People may accept it once, even twice, but as the old saying goes, “twice burned…” Don’t risk it; your relationships are too valuable. As my lovely Grandma used to say “be honest, then you don’t need a good memory”

 Be closed-minded.

An unwillingness to consider other ideas and points of view, and/or to create an atmosphere of, “it’s going to be my way or the highway…,” will certainly cut-off communication and eventually shatter trust.

Strong “Powerful and Direct” communicators can fall victim to this as they tend to take control and forget others have ideas too. Ensure that you are allowing each person to have their say, not only will you build trust but you will ensure a great outcome as you have invited all ideas to come forth.

Trust is critical in all of our relationships, particularly in the personal and work realm. Take stock and have a think about how you can be a better builder and mess of a destroyer of trust and your relationship will certainly flourish.

Until next time, Care, Connect and be a Courageous Communicator.  Let’s change the world we live in one conversation at a time.

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