Help! Why do I do what I do?

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What is your Communication DNA?

What is it that makes you who you are? There is the age-old nature versus nurture debate. There is no doubt that genetics has contributed much of who you are, as well as your environment and experiences. Relationships Australia found that 68% of all relationship breakdown is cause by poor communication!

If you first understand yourself, you can then begin to understand others. This will allow you to communicate with purpose with intention. Intentional communication is the key to minimising poor communication.

I’d like to share with you some simple tools to help you understand why you do what you do and just as importantly why others do what they do. This all comes from what I call your Communication DNA. Your behavioral make up if you like.

Now you are all unique, but there are consistent communication patterns that all of us fall into. Research over many years from prominent American psychologist William Marston helped us to understand a simple model for communication styles.

Today I am sharing with you my take on communication styles. It’s called Communication DNA and you can see it just over here to left.

There are 4 prominent styles, Powerful, Playful, Patient and Perfectionist. Each of you has some of all four but preferences in 1 or 2 of the styles. Each style has its own characteristics, traits you observe, things you want to feel fulfilled and needs you have.

It is almost impossible to authentically connect with another human if you do not fully understand yourself and then are able to understand and fully accept them, for all of their wonderful uniqueness.

When you don’t understand someone else and they are quite different from you, the likelihood of poor communication increases drastically. The more frustrated you become the more stressed and emotional the situation becomes, the more likely you will slip into toxic unhealthy communication.

In order for you to communicate well with people who have very different styles and needs to you, you first need to understand you needs and then be able to identify the needs of others. In coming posts we will share the four different styles that make up our Communication DNA, as well as point you to various resources that will help you become the best communicator you can be.

Stay tuned, join the Communication Revolution and by all means please share this with anyone you feel would benefit. Next time we will look in detail at the Powerful Communicator. This may be your dominant communication style, if not you have lived or worked with someone with this style. It’s time to understand them!

Until next time, Care, Connect and be a Conscious Communicator

Let’s change our world for the better, one conversation at a time.

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